Pedophile Style?

So I met a new guy this weekend, Saturday night. He drove about an hour to meet me. I drove 3 minutes, that is the way it should be after all, right ladies? We had exchanged a handful of emails and text messages. He seemed decent (they all do), he did use terrible pick up lines that I just pretended he didn't use - are those still a thing? Guys, stop!

In one of our exchanges he mentioned that he thought we had exchanged emails in the past (well, that should have been my first clue), but that we had never met up. Later he gave me some line about how we were going to meet up but I jetted off to Michigan and then we never talked again. Sounds about right...there was probably a reason.

He called me before we met up on Saturday. He said that the restaurant we would be attending was only a 2.1 rating on Google, but that he was willing to "take the risk" on this restaurant because it was really the company that he cared about...talk about a line!

I ordered a $3 beer. I got carded. He ordered an $11 fru fru drink after asking the waitress about the cost of everything. He didn't get carded. He made some weird comment about how it had been a while since he'd gone out with a woman who was carded for a drink. We ordered an appetizer of chips and salsa and he was appalled that we had to pay for them - usually chips and salsa are free in his dream land. The food was mediocre and the conversation was mostly okay. He talked about his ex and seemed jaded. He talked about stay at home moms and how that didn't seem like a "real" job because that's what his ex used to do...blah blah blah. Don't worry ladies, I schooled him on how hard a stay at home mom works and dared him to try it sometime...maybe that's why we went dutch when the bill came.

To be honest this was a confusing date. The "gentleman" was more than a decade older than me and I'm not sure if he invited me out out of spite for his ex (who is re married with a kiddo btw) or because he was interested in me. He said he'd like to see me again, but then let me pay half the tab. We hugged, left the 2.1 restaurant and then I never heard from him again.

I'll probably marry this one.