Watch Me Walk Away

New Potential: Mr. Hornball
Meeting Place: Buffalo Wild Wings

I started talking with a new potential last week and met up with him this week. He seemed half way decent. Had a job. Didn't live with his folks, although I later learned that he has a roommate he also calls brother, but whatevs right? New year, new me, new rules. He's saving money. Just kidding he clearly has no money. Want to know how I know? As soon as I showed up he was waiting and he said something like "I'll buy the first round, you buy the second." Then he handed the waitress the exact amount of our bill. That's cute, someone who doesn't believe in tipping...#sarcasmfont

He proceeded to have awkward conversation the ENTIRE date. I've never wanted to leave so badly and to be honest...I've never had the guts to leave mid date, but I've always dreamed that I would one day be able to just walk out. Today was not that day. During every single lull in the conversation he would fill the empty space with the phrase "and what else." I'll tell you what else, buddy, get a new line and how about you tell me something about you for a change.

Eventually the conversation turned something terrible when he asked me how many one night stands I've had. 0 to be exact. He held up his hand as if to high-5 me and said "awesome me too" Something tells me that's a lie, like the fact that you felt comfortable asking me the question in the first place. He then asked how far sexually I would feel comfortable going on a first date. Uh, douchebag, you see the distance between us now...it's going to stay that way.  He asked me what I was doing later. Well, since it's about 6:30pm now...I assume I'll probably be watching TV and going to bed...ALONE. I made up some line about running errands and doing a little shopping. He followed that up with "that's too bad, I was hoping we could go back to your place and watch a movie"

I have a feeling "watch a movie" to him does not actually mean watch a movie.

I'll probably marry this one.